Today has been an up and down day. Started off not good, in a horrid mood and oh so tired. Paul got up early and preceded to make it impossible for me to stay in bed after he had waited kindly for about an hour. Still too early for me! The day was redeemed with some yummy lunch and a quick trip to town for me (with Dolores, but oh so nice to get out of the house). Plus talking over some of the things bugging me, like the impossible standards set by cps (not that they have ever come to us, just reading about it online, and it really upset me, knowing that there is NO way I could do that as par for course. I could for a visit or a guest, but not every single day, so overwhelming). So silly to worry about things you can’t even control and have no reason to worry.
The other flip floppy part of the day was a few hours ago. We have this cat that lives across the street, she’s an outdoor kitty that for some reason really likes us. Sleeps on our outdoor chairs and steps and always comes when we are outside. Tonight I hurt her, and she won’t come/stay when she sees us. I was closing the van door, and didn’t see her, I don’t even know what part of her I closed in the door. I feel horrible, and keep hoping she’ll be out there. I know that’s silly too, but Paul LOVES this cat, like if we were needing a pet, we would be asking her people if we could make her our cat, we don’t NEED any pets (we have oh, oh, too many as it is!). I just hope she’s not injured and comes back. She is the only thing that got Paul past his not wanting to be outside, now he sits on the steps to eat his lunch with her!
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5 comments:
re: your question on katherine's blog, I find the main difference is that once my older two girls grew old enough to help out, I really am not on my own anymore. I found as each child turned four, they switched "sides" from being a taker all the time, to being a giver/helper some of the time, and this increased as they matured even more. My oldest 2 are almost 8, and 6.5, and they do the main cleanup stuff (clean up after meals, sweep floors, clean up the toys) and I can concentrate on making the meals, taking care of the babies and even doing projects. Also they are old enough to help supervise so I don't have to jump up every 2 minutes. So, that is the main difference in my home between the under-4 years and now. I think even with more children (I have 6) it's easier now than it was when I had only 2 or 3, who were under 4.
What do you think?
I only have two young ones, but I think you are dead on right with that. Do you homeschool? I think having the kids at home also makes a difference, they are there to help all day, rather than just a few hours.
I think I may have read your reply wrong on Katherine's blog. I thought you were meaning 'now' as in this time, like 2010, not this time as in with just littles. But my thoughts on that also have some to do with my thoughts on what I thought you said:). People used to have more family/neighborly help, more community minded. Stay at home moms weren't these little islands (you know, isolated and alone with just the kids). I think parenting was easier 'back then' because there was more support avalible, generally speaking. My thoughts also go further into things like women were okay with having their life be kids and home, there was no one telling them that there was something 'better', like society in general seems to believe now. Now stay at home moms are seen as sacrificing so much, rather than as doing their duty/vocation/calling. I'll stop there since I don't want to go to far, especially when I am the one that misunderstood!
Thanks for your response though :), my son at 3.5 is starting to have that change, I see it in a few things, not daily, but a couple times a week. If I ask him, he's a great helper, most of the time (like when he's not super tired or mad about something already).
oh-- you are right i DID mean that! I forgot that I said that. Duh. lol It is true, the thing is, people could let their kids out of their sight and not worry. They could play outside on the block with their friends from the morning until the night, in one another's homes, and nobody thought a thing. Now, you can't even leave your kids in a parked car with the windows down in 70 degree weather for 1 minute while you find your missing child http://freerangekids.wordpress.com/2010/10/08/get-real/
before someone threatenes to call the government on you.
And I totally agree with you on the rest -the community, the help, the not wanting "more" -- it all contributed to an easier life. The kids played outdoors in all weather, the moms were on the phone all day with their friend (if you believe the movies and TV :)). It just wasn't that rough!
sorry for not remembering what I was talking about... heh
Sarah Faith, I'm sorry for the delay in replying. We have been sick for far too long!
I love that free range kids blog. It is how we are with our kids, or as much as we can be without worrying over someone calling us in! People need to mind their own business more than they do!
Agree though, it was easier. I was or have been thinking about this a lot since you wrote and I think there is so much more to this. Like just the evolution of the American family. Or I would say, the downfall of family in our society. It's long and I can't remember all the pieces, I will say, it could have been the cold meds! :) but it made sense!
Yeah! It's not so much that people need to mind their own business as they need to use that noseyness and buttinski-ism to HELP rather than report people. So you think that it's dangerous to leave kids in a car unattended? Well, attend them! Or help a 9 yr old cross the street. Let the kid on the bike go before you make your right turn. Whatever. It's a combination of the "hands off, it's not my problem" attitude with the "i'm so outraged at your parenting" that makes it so noxious.
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